Updates from August, 2010 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • scott howard 7:00 am on August 31, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bullshit, Cake, Distance, flying   

    25: Reluctantly crouched at the starting line 

    Engines pumping and thumping in time…

    At least that’s how I feel right now. All revved up and still waiting for the green light so I can get going.

    Today is a very important day to me. No, there’s no other significance other than that which I have placed on it. It has been exactly one year since I have been flying for my own pleasure. Flying huh? Yes, some of you may be asking that. Well, I never mentioned it until now. Another interesting fact about me is that yes, I’m a pilot and since September of 2008, I have been working on obtaining my pilot’s certificate and enhancing it to a point where I can make money being a pilot.

    This past year has been up and down and had its rough spots for me. Mainly, because I got mixed up in this bullshit about how I didn’t give all the pertinent information to the A.M.E. about my entire life history of any medical issues or drugs taken. So now, (last year), this asshole who acts like a douche because he thinks that because he went to Berkeley, he can be a douche to everybody else, decided to call the FAA on me. So, this past year, I have been going through all kinds of loops with the FAA in order to get my Airman’s Medical Certificate reinstated. Yes, the certificate has been under review this past year. Hence, no flying.

    Well now, one year has passed and most of my situation has been resolved.

    The FAA wanted me to submit to them, an eye evaluation solely because of my history of strabismus (better known as the lazy eye). It ends up that my eyes haven’t changed very much since my last evaluation 12 years ago. I still have 20/15 vision in both eyes, uncorrected; and in all other aspects, my vision far exceeds any minimum requirements the FAA uses for medical certification.

    It’s been a long year so this post is showing up a bit late because I was taking time to reflect on my experiences this past year. I wanted to think about my understanding of things then, and my more educated understanding of things now. I think that in this past year, I have developed a different take on life. I seem to understand more about what life has to offer in a wider array of events and experiences. Nothing is completely about me, however, as things happen, I can take them in and make them all about me, or I can take them in and recognize that there is more to their purpose than I may shortsightedly recognize.

    To make a long story short. Life is too short to get angry and hold grudges about anything negative that happens to you.

    Life is about taking deep breaths, relaxing, being positive and productive and being the best you can be.

    Life is what you make of it.


    • dannifoley 9:03 pm on September 9, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      This song was played on the radio while I was at work today!

  • weekendkeyboardwarrior 6:43 am on August 30, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Age, Aging, Back Pain, Chiropractor, Doctor, FML, Hurt, Old, Pain   

    24: Old Age Sets in Early 

    Another Pre-write… sorry.

    Alright, so I’ve had back problems lately; namely from the torture that I constantly put my body through by cramming myself into tiny airplane seats and sitting at poker tables for 12 to 14 hours a day.  And juuuuuuust when I thought my back problems couldn’t get any worse… they did! You see, I’m usually sleeping on hotel mattresses that have very little support for my back (at least so it seems), and that has caused me a great deal of pain over the course of the past month!

    And I thought to myself, “Can I possibly be hurting any worse than I am now?”


    So, there I was walking through the Deli at the Rio Casino in Las Vegas holding my tray “waitress style” with one hand while I reach for a Gatorade with the other hand when…


    My back pops three times — each one progressively more painful than the last — and suddenly I cannot turn my head or back, cannot bend over and standing up and sitting down cause me to go into excruciating pain!

    Just getting up out of a chair would cause a single tear to trickle down my cheek, and getting in and out of bed was nearly an impossible task (let alone finding a position comfortable enough to sleep in). That hotel room was my hell for two days!

    But then, a wonderful thing happened!

    One night my Romanian friend Mihai tells me that we are all going to get a private poker game going that night.  I went to the game despite my predicament, and I spent the night whining and complaining about how much pain I was in!  After getting tired of my whining, my South African friend Rousseau pipes up and tells me how one of the other Romanian players was previously a Chiropractor back in his home town!

    Actually, he described him as a “Doctorrrrrr… of….. You know…. the back.”

    “A Chiropractor?”

    “Yes, yes… that is the word.  I don’t know ya language fa fackawl!”

    Apparently, he was a practicing doctor in Romania, but the Romanian healthcare system doesn’t pay all that much, so he is actually making a bit more money playing poker.  Oh, and by the way he’s also about the size of a house!  This dude works out so much that he now looks like an upside-down pyramid.  I’m a pretty big guy myself, and he makes me look like an infant by comparison!

    So I wait until the next day and try to find my new doctor — I spent a good part of the morning patrolling the hotel hallway waiting for him to appear, when I finally see him come out of his room and I jump on the opportunity!

    “HEY! There’s the man I’m looking for!”

    He looks around as though he thinks I am talking about somebody else…

    “I heard that you’re a Chiropractor!”, I said

    “Who tell you this?” he replies…

    “Rousseau… He said you’re very good!” I say

    “Ahhhhhhh… Rousseau, he give away my secret! Yes, I am back doctor in Romania. What you need? Do you have pain?”

    I tell him my story about my instant pain at the deli the other day, and he takes me into the hotel Gym, tells me to lie face-down on one of the yoga mats and puts a rolled up blanket under my head.  At this point, my gay-o-meter was higher than I usually prefer, so I was starting to wonder if I had made a mistake.  But, I decide to trust him and do as he says.

    He starts doing some pushing on several different nerves throughout my back, legs, arms and neck to find out where the pain is coming from.

    Nearly every spot he pushes on causes me to yell with pain.. the kind of pain that could make a dead man cry.

    He says, “Okay, I think I have found the problem disk…” and begins to explain to me in very broken english what the problem is.  It was difficult, but through a mixture of hand and arm signals I was actually able to understand him, and I tell him to go ahead and do what he needs to do.

    He forces me into a series of stretches and then does some forced “popping” of specific vertebrae in my back while continually telling me to “RELAX!”. Now, “relax” is a hard thing to do when a Romanian man who looks like a Rhino-Antelope-hybrid is working on your back, but somehow I manage to do it.

    He does all of this popping and then kneels down beside me.  He places his knee on my oblique, just below my ribs and uses his hands to grab myother side just below my armpit.

    And with ZERO warning, he simultaneously pulls back with his hands while thrusting forward with his knee!  It was quite possibly the most painful three-tenths of a second I have ever experienced.  And then — Nirvana!

    He goes back through the nerve tests to see how much pain is there now…. IT’S FREAKING GONE!

    I felt a sense of relief that I can only imagine rivals that of a hooker after a negative test result at the STD clinic! I got up and started jumping around like an idiot — So he grabs me by the shoulders to stop me from moving around, and tells me to be careful because the disks are only re-seated and they will take a few days to go fully back into alignment.

    He then advises me that I will also be a bit sore for the next day or so (and he was correct!) and sends me on my way!  He was going to do all this for free, but I couldn’t let him do this, so I gave him $100 for his help (I figure that’s probably what my co-pay would’ve been, anyway), and he told me that if I start to feel pain again that I should tell him and he would re-align my spine once more.  What a godsend this man was!

    And now… pretty soon, I will be getting back on a plane; which assuredly means more back pain.

    ~ Roy “weekendkeyboardwarrior”

    • dannifoley 10:34 am on August 30, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      I was wondering why I thought I’d read this before, and that’s because I had! You told me about it when you wrote it, and I read it then!

  • Mr Str8 Fwd 8:48 am on August 27, 2010 Permalink | Reply  

    23: Generation Canyon 

    Sign of the times indeed. My older sister is 3 years older than me. Not much of a difference between the two of us. However I’ve noticed that people 3 years younger than me are VERY different. They see me as some kind of old man.I don’t know if it’s technology differences or they’re just being ignorant. I know about all the stuff that went on before I was born, but this new generation either doesn’t know or doesn’t care. It’s sad for me to even say new generation because theyre not that much younger than me. But the differences are staggering. Remember I’m only 22 years old!

    When I was in elementary school I played with yo-yo’s and the original brick gameboy. We used words like “the bomb diggity” and “phat”. I remember being on my block and girls would get phone cords from the Nynex truck and play double dutch. This was back when extension cords were out. Running from the living room through the dining room to the kitchen. I remember paper transfers on the bus and tokens! Way before metro cards. I remember sega game gear for crying out loud. I was indeed around when the first playstation came out. In fact I still have mine and still play it occasionally. I can tell you where I was when Biggie Smalls died, when Tupac died. I remember when Bill Clinton was running for president. The list goes on and on. However theses whippershnappers act as if it’s ancient history.

    Hell! I remember the times before the pokemon craze started. I can tell you stories of Windows 95 and America Online 3.0. Remember when NetZero and Juno swept the nation? The internet isn’t that old! I even remember when Myspace first started up, now it’s Facebook and twitter. It’s a little disheartning to know these bastards only know internet. Shit I even remember watching wrestling before Sting switched to black and white face paint. Now everything is in shambles. If all of this makes me old than I thank God for being old. I can spend days without the internet, my phone is of very little importance to me, and today’s music doesn’t interest me. I feel the times are changing too quickly. I have a ipod touch but I perfer to use my ipod nano. I feel it’s a better piece of equipment. I use a Centro because it’s easier to get parts for it than a treo. I’m a palm lover. I have no need for androids or black berry’s. Hell, I can recall a time when blackberry struggled to keep up with treo’s. But since people want more flashy devices, the solid OS known as palm has become obsolete. But I just laugh when people give my phone a strange look. I follow my mind and not what the tube tells me. I rarely watch tv also.

    This new generation kills me, they really do. Just because technology changes by the day doesn’t mean theres anything wrong with the old stuff. If you try and keep up with technology you’ll be in debt. I still think about my future. Saving money to buy a house etc. It’s a buyers market and if your not careful you’ll be doing a whole lot of buying. Don’t forget that there’s more to life than technology. So many of these younger people don’t know how to interact. Remember social skills used to be important? Face to face skills, talking skills, and such. And the scary thing for me is, I like the older generations. Men from previous decades were real men. They had class, they had style, and they were bad-ass (for lack of a better term). But I’ve always had an ancient spirit even at a very young age. It’s only natural for me to shun these new age ideas. But as old as I act, it has nothing to do with this gap.

    I wonder what the kids growing up now will be like. They’ll probably knock these teens off their asses. My niece isn’t even one yet and I can see her brain working. It’s incredible how fast they develop nowadays. Things are developing so quickly. Please don’t forget to enjoy LIFE. It’s not all about keeping up with the times. Sometimes it’s better to keep up with YOURSELF. How do YOU feel about what’s happening. Even the news! Nothing but cleavage and Ken-doll meteorologists. Please don’t lose yourself. I’m begging you. So this is my challenge to you….interact. Just as my fellow-tabber before me. Try a act of kindness. Try reaching out to people out of your cultural zone. Call customer service and actually treat them like a human being. Call your parents. Do something. Don’t get caught in the trap. There’s still a lot to be done, and if your not careful you’ll miss out. Don’t be blinded by what’s popular and go for what you really want. There’s nothing wrong with new technology but there’s other things out there. Open your mind!

    • weekendkeyboardwarrior 11:22 am on August 27, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Jesus… YOUR post just made me feel old.

      I won’t explain why or how… but… yeah. *frown face*

      Nice post, though. Every generation to ever grace the Earth has thought that the generation before them was outdated, and the generation after them was lazy. We all feel that only our own age-group has made the greatest impact on the world, but when we look at it in the grand scheme of things… none of us are even a blip on the timeline of the Earth.

  • bghb 3:12 am on August 27, 2010 Permalink | Reply  

    22: Operation Iraqi Freedom is OVER 

    Sorry I’m a little late everyone. I woke up early for school and then immediately had to go to work until about 10:30 today and once I got off I got caught up watching Jon Stewart and the Colbert report. But technically its still 11:50pm where I am so I still have time! As long as I type fast! haha!

    Apparently operation Iraqi Freedom is over! That’s great, I’m sure all those soldiers are dying to come home. Although just the combat ones are leaving not everyone. ANYWAY I can’t talk about it too much because I’m not gonna lie, I’m not the most knowledgeable on those subjects so I’ll just stop.

    A friend of mine awhile back showed me some funny things on Craigslist and since then I’ve become somewhat addicted to looking at it. I look at the free stuff (I’ve actually seen some cool stuff for free) I look at the antiques and furniture for sale, I look at the jobs (I’d really like a new job) and I look at the stuff in the personals from the dating to the casual encounters. I really like to look at the stuff in strictly platonic because it’s just fascinating to me that people are posting on there to find new friends. It’s really kinda sad that its become so hard now-a-days for people to make new friends unless you are talking about a few work friends or if you have school or anything like that. But if you’re not going to school and don’t want to be friends with your work people, what do you do? Once your past high school it’s totally inappropriate to go sit with a random person somewhere just to chat with them right? Well I’m going to challenge myself. I am NOT the most outgoing person in the world. In fact a lot of the time I ask friends with me to ask someone something for me because I’m too shy to do it.

    I’ve noticed kids around my campus during the lunch hour I have, sitting at tables by themself looking around at people awkwardly trying to look occupied with their food, iPod or cellphone. Who are you kidding? We all know your just trying to look occupied so no one notices you sitting by yourself. And I’m a victim of it too, normally I have one friend at my school who I did lunch with but she has such an opposite schedule of me this semester that she’s not even there half the time. So I’m going to try to make a point to sit with a person I don’t know, someone who’ sitting by themself. This was possibly both of us can mae a new lunch buddy and if we get along well enough then maybe good enough friends to go hang on the weekends! Which would be great because it seems a lot of my friends right now are DRAMA LLAMAS!

    Damn its 12:05am. I’m 5 mins late. Well I had to look for pictures so cut me some slack!

    • dannifoley 5:01 am on August 28, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Five minutes? Gasp! Haha, at least it’s up! And sitting with random people at lunch is a great idea, I made one of my good friends from college that way. Just be careful because some people can be jerks about it – I recall one situation where some girl went completely mental on me and 2 of my friends because we sat down at a table with her. She was sitting by herself at a table intended for 8 people during one of the busiest times at the dining hall, we tried talking to her and she started flipping out “What the fuck do you think you’re doing? I was sitting here first, that’s so rude of you to sit here.” We asked if she was waiting for other people and she said “No, I just want to eat alone.” We said we would just talk amongst ourselves, but there was no where else to sit, and she told us we were ignorant for sitting with her before storming off.
      Moral of the story: It’s a great idea, but some people may not like it as much as you do. Don’t take it to heart, some people are just crazy!

  • Dee 6:25 am on August 25, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , random acts of kindness, ,   

    21: No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. – Aesop 

    I just want to preface this by saying I am not writing this post to say what an awesome person I am or whatever, it’s more just a random thought (which is kind of what I’m known for) mixed with a hope to inspire others.

    I try to commit an act of random kindness everyday. Some days the opportunity doesn’t present itself, but when it does I try to seize it. I’m not talking about running into traffic to save a helpless kitten or anything – let’s be sensible here! I just mean small acts that can put a smile on someone else’s face. I find that such acts are very rare in modern society which is why I consider it even more important that I do them. The funny part is that it really doesn’t take much effort to make someone’s day so I have no idea why these random acts are so uncommon. Here are my “kind acts” for the past few days:

    Saturday: On my way home from work a lady slipped and fell on a slippery patch on the sidewalk. Despite the fact that the sidewalk was busy, I was the only person to turn around to help her up and gather her belongings. I made sure she was not hurt and that she was going to be ok. This woman was so grateful and so amazed that anyone had stopped to help her – especially someone my age.

    Monday: I was walking home from shopping with my sister when I noticed an old man having trouble crossing a somewhat busy street (where I’m from, cars don’t stop). I asked him if he was alright and where he was trying to get, and he confirmed my belief. I waited until I was able to walk into the street and stood in the middle until he was completely across. Again, he was very thankful.

    Tuesday: I was waiting for a bus to my parents house when I noticed a guy in the station seemed to be having a bad night. He had a kind of cute face and was rather heavy set – not a guy I would normally look at twice. We ended up being in the same compartment of the train and I intentionally sat a few seats down on the opposite side so we were sort of facing each other. I waited until I had his attention and gave him the “one over” – you know that look when you’re checking someone out. When I made eye contact with him, I winked and he just smiled. He ended up getting off at the next stop, but when he was leaving I saw that he had that “I totally just got checked out look” on his face.

    Maybe these little acts did nothing in the grand scheme of things, but I like to think they at least brightened those people’s days. So now I set forth a challenge to anybody reading this: I challenge you to do one random act of kindness in the next week. When you do, leave me a comment about what you did. I can’t wait to see what you do! See you next week tabbers!

    • weekendkeyboardwarrior 8:42 am on August 25, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      You know, I think the death of kindness has some culprits behind it.

      I have noticed it as well, but I think part of the reason for it is that:

      A) good samaritans tend to have a short shelf-life. Far too often you hear of people who do a good deed getting taking advantage of. Everything from the extremes, such as getting beaten/tortured/raped/murdered…. to just plain getting the shaft.

      Most notably I once saw a news story about a man who was sued for performing the heimlich maneuver on an individual who was choking… the recipient sued (and won) because some ribs were broken in the process, but a broken rib is FAR better than the alternative, most would argue. Regardless, these unscrupulous acts by greedy people are what have put such a stigma on random acts of kindness.

      B) Even even when nothing bad happens to you, your act may not be appreciated by the recipient. With personal pride lasting long into the later years of life; if you attempt to help an “elderly” person do something… they might take offense to you assuming that they NEED your help, and actually get ANGRY with you rather than appreciate what you viewed as a “good deed”.

      Just some perspective.

    • bghb 5:14 am on August 27, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Oh dang! I should have read your post before I posted because we totally relate. My random act’s of kindness coming up were basically consisting of me sitting with random strangers at lunch so neither of us have to sit alone but I’m going to take on your challenge aswell and try to do other things.

  • scott howard 7:00 am on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , golf, scuba diving, swimming, , vacation   

    20: A much needed vacation 

    As I mentioned last week, I was on vacation in beautiful Hawaii.

    The parents invited me out for a short five day visit to Maui. I think what I liked most about the vacation was being in a different environment which I hadn’t been to for a while. Well, in all of these short five days, I think we were able to pack a lot into them. Two of the days were taken up by golfing, another day by scuba diving with my dad and the remaining two days included chilling out at the condo working on a puzzle and hanging out at the pool/beach.

    Also, thanks to being single agian, being in Hawaii had its advantages, I didn’t feel like I needed to restrain myself in any way, and it allowed for me, the opportunity to start letting loose and reintegrating myself into the wide world of dating opportunities.

    I have always found that the hot tub, of all places, is a great location to meet all kinds of people. I had a couple different conversations with some kids and families who were visiting from California and I also met three friends who were visiting the islands from New York. That blew me away, I have never met anybody in Hawaii who came from New York. I just though all New Yorkers went to the Bahamas to get their tropical fix of a vacation. Regardless, I enjoyed meeting some new people and having some good conversations at the pool.

    Enjoying Drinks in "Tia Juana"

    There's nothing better than indulging yourself in the presence of a beautiful woman.

    I also mentioned some golfing. Well, I was rather surprised with myself. My golfing form, without even practicing, has improved, unfortunately, that doesn’t go for my score. I can hit the ball straight and I can keep up with a group, however, my score is still varied between 110 and 120 strokes, nowhere near a good game.

    Other than how I played, the golfing in itself was fun. My dad and I played in a foursome with two friends of my dad’s family. One thing I can say about golf, the golf course is the only place where it is legal to drink and drive. It was the first of two rounds of golf I played during the vacation, but as a group of guys, we all had fun. As always, after finishing the 18th hole, the four of us went to Tia Juana’s to kick back, have some drinks, chips and salsa and enjoy the pleasures of the 19th hole. We even got the hostess to join in with our antics. She was very fun.  🙂

    I golfed again on Tuesday afternoon, just dad and myself. We still had a fun round, but my score was better the first time I played. The second time, we definitely played a “hurry up” round of golf because we had also made a 4:30 dinner reservation on the other side of the island. We still had fun playing, but wow, we played fast. If an average game of golf is about 4:30, we definitely finished in about 3:30, a full hour ahead of the pace. That gave us time to shower before going to dinner at Mama’s Fish House.

    Just starting off with the Plantation Punch 🙂 YUM! So refreshing!

    Now THAT is what I call a stuffed fish! My mouth is watering just thinking about this dish again.

    Mama’s is probably the most expensive restaurant on Maui but they really do know their food. As a starter drink, I had their Plantation Punch, excellent tropical drink to kick you off. Then for the main course, I had the stuffed Mahi Mahi. YUM!

    However, its not just about the food at this restaurant, it’s about the view and the location. They are right on their own private beach with palm trees and a view of the afterglow from the sunset. Amazing!

    As much as I want to keep talking about food, I still must add one more event to this post. Its my way of saving the best for last. Scuba Diving. On Monday morning, dad and I got up early so we could get ready to meet up with the dive boat. It ends up that the dive company we were with always dive off the coast of Lana’i. The two dive sites we visited were Sharkfin Rock, at the southern-most tip of the island, and Cathedrals I (as it’s locally known).

    Like any other dive, I had the chance to see a lot of different fish and eels and coral that I don’t normally see. I even saw a very rare Hawaiian Turkey Fish, indigenous to Hawai’i. While on our second dive at Cathedrals, we were swimming with one of the many white tip reef sharks that hang out in the different dive spots.

    Playing with a Pacific Red Octopus.

    This picture to the left was taken at the very end of our first dive. One of the divemasters found a little octopus and picked it up to start playing with it. Of course it spit out all of its ink like it would normally do, however, after a while, I think it figured out that we weren’t going to eat it, we just wanted to play. So, here I am under about 60 feet of water playing with a little octopus. What surprised me the most was how soft and smooth they feel to the touch. Very peaceful. However, the strange sensation is feeling all its tentacles sucking onto you so it doesn’t go anywhere when you move. Whenever you get a chance while diving, play with an octopus, it really is fun and different.

    Well, I know I’m long winded and I really wanted to get this post out, so here it is for all to enjoy.

    Until next time. 🙂

  • weekendkeyboardwarrior 7:12 am on August 23, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: children, confused, , fiance, , house, , , marriage, moving, scared   

    19: Times They Are a Changin’ 

    Quick Note:  I will be writing on Monday’s from now on.  So you can now expect to start off your week with a bit of douche-baggery via my posts.

    So, my girlfriend and I are in the middle of some changes in our life; recently, I sold my house and we are now in the process of moving to a house in a different area of Albuquerque.  I am not at home now, and so I have only been helping to direct this circus from afar, while my girlfriend has been handling the lion’s share of the moving-related bullshit.

    The main reason for our move is because Albuquerque has morphed in a way over the last five years; it’s a very ghetto city with a bit of a gang problem.  But, for as long as I have lived there, the gang problem has been localized to certain areas of town – most people know which sections to avoid, thus it has never really been that big of a problem.  Recently, however, the problem has expanded and caused the face of Albuquerque to change.  My house used to be outside of the trouble spots and in a “decent” section of town, but lately, the crime/murder rates in my area have gone up steadily, and I have felt less and less comfortable living in that neighborhood.  So, I sold my house and my girlfriend and I are renting out a house owned by a friend of ours until we close on our new place in Rio Rancho, NM.

    To add to the changes in my life… there’s a new “love sheriff” in town:  my five-year-old daughter!

    Sammy and I having a hot chocolate/staring contest.

    My daughter lives with my ex-wife, but they only live a short drive to our north in Colorado, so I get to see them often (except when I’m away from home).  Just the other day, I get an e-mail from my ex-wife that read like this…

    So here is something to make you smile. Samantha asked me if Pam was her second Mommy.  I explained to her sort-of, and said that when you and Pam get married, Pam will be her “step-mommy”.  And out of your daughter’s mouth was: “Well I want Daddy to marry her now, because I like Pam!”

    So, apparently I have just been ordered by my daughter to stop fuckin’ around and get married!  To which I will sheepishly reply “yes ma’am”… you see even though it’s been a while since my divorce, the thought of marriage still gives me the creeps!  But, now that my daughter is getting to that age where she is wondering exactly how Pam fits into her life (and, then asking questions about it), Pam and I need to stop being so selfish and start aiming to keep Samantha’s view of the family dynamic somewhat in-tact, post-divorce.

    Pam, The Kids, and Myself

    Still… Pam is a great woman, and I couldn’t have asked for anyone better in my life, but there’s just something about the word “marriage” that sends a chill down my spine!  I don’t know if it’s the finality of it all, or the fact that once I put that ring on, “splitting up” will require lawyers and court dates… whereas now, if we ever get sick of each other, it simply requires a blissful “sayonara” to dissolve our union.  Not that I would ever want to, I’m just saying… what if?

    The funny thing is:  Pam SHARES my view on the subject!  Semi-recently divorced herself, the thought of marriage makes her tremble in her Nike’s a bit, as well!  So, what’s a couple to do?

    These changes are on their way though, to spite our best attempts to slow them down.  And it seems that the locomotive that is my life keeps rolling down the tracks and shows no signs of slowing down.  AND I’M NOT EVEN 30-YEARS-OLD YET!  Frankly, it all scares me to death!

    ~Roy “weekendkeyboardwarrior”

    • 10loladahl 7:53 am on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      What do I know about family and children… The simple thought makes me uncomfortable; I’m still too immature and selfish for that.
      I do know about moving out t keep yourself away from security problems… That I know very well…

      • weekendkeyboardwarrior 9:00 am on August 25, 2010 Permalink | Reply

        Hey! Lola! Glad you’re stopping by, chica! And yes, the thought of being the patriarchal figure of my family STILL makes me uncomfortable, despite the fact that it has already come to fruition.

        “You know when you were a kid and you thought that there were actually ‘adults’ out there; and that they knew everything… and then one day you’re at the super-market and the bag boy calls you ‘sir’… and you’re like ‘What the fuck?! I’m an adult?! You mean to tell me that NONE of us have a fucking clue?'”
        ~ Joe Rogan

    • dannifoley 7:27 pm on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Aww! Such a cute story! It’s so sweet that your daughter feels that way!

      • weekendkeyboardwarrior 9:04 am on August 25, 2010 Permalink | Reply

        Yeah, my daughter can be adorable at times… but she also has a Mr. Hyde aspect to her personality that usually comes out when she gets tired.

    • weekendkeyboardwarrior 8:59 am on August 25, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Hey! Lola! Glad you’re stopping by, chica! And yes, the thought of being the patriarchal figure of my family STILL makes me uncomfortable, despite the fact that it has already come to fruition.

      “You know when you were a kid and you thought that there were actually ‘adults’ out there; and that they knew everything… and then one day you’re at the super-market and the bag boy calls you ‘sir’… and you’re like ‘What the fuck?! I’m an adult?! You mean to tell me that NONE of us have a fucking clue?'”
      ~ Joe Rogan

  • weekendkeyboardwarrior 7:00 am on August 21, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , girls, Hotties, , , , veterinarians, Women,   

    18: The Death of Honesty 

    I know I told you that I was going to do the second-half of the travel blog… but, I lied.  I’ve already written that blog, and I thought, since I’m not very busy this week, that I would do a “real time” blog and save the RyanAir story for another time.

    Alright, so let me preface this post by giving you a little history – first of all, my girlfriend is an awesome person!  Her name is Pam and she’s a veterinarian who works at a clinic near my house, which is actually how we met; she was working on one of my dogs who bit his tail off a while back (it’s a long story, I’ll tell it another time), and we started talking, hit it off and decided to start dating.  We’ve been together for about five years now, and during the course of our relationship we’ve never been short on brutal honesty.  I think the reason for this honesty is not so much about “trust” as it is about “lack of filtration between brain and mouth” – we usually just say what is on our minds with absolutely no forethought.  Neither of us can really be accused of being self-conscious, so we usually don’t care what each other say as long as words don’t turn into actions… and they never have.

    It’s worked out pretty good for us thus far – she tells me when I’m being a douche (which is quite often), and I tell her when she’s being a snotty bitch (decidedly less often).  And then we reassess ourselves and move on.  Works like a charm!

    Occasionally, though, we take it a step too far and offer a little too much information on our thoughts to each other… and, I did just that a short while ago.

    You see, one thing the veterinary field does not have, is a lack of smoking hot, twenty-something women – and the staff at her clinic is Exhibit A!  Every last one of the docs there looks as though they might have paid for their schooling via soft-core porn.  I’d give most of them about an 8 on ye ole 10-point system… my girlfriend, however is on the lower end of that Bell Curve.  This is not to say that she’s not attractive, she’s highly attractive in my opinion; it’s just that when compared to the women she works with, her shimmer dulls a bit.  One girl – we’ll call her “Wendy” (names have been removed to protect the guilty) – is particularly noteworthy!

    She’s tall-ish, slender (but not overly slender), has curves in all the right places, and always has this “quiet-but-confident” attitude about her.  She doesn’t say much, but you can tell that she probably loses her inhibitions when she drops the lab coat.  And to top it all off, she’s always smiling, which makes her hard to miss when you walk in there.

    Now, I have no misconceptions about my own looks… I will never be confused for George Clooney or Leo Di Caprio, and I’m fully aware of this!  So, I know for a fact that even if I was single, these women would still be out of my league.  Hell… as long as we’re using baseball clichés:  I’m in Little League and they’re warming up for the MLB All-Star Game!  But, let’s be honest, what Little Leaguer doesn’t have dreams of violating playing with the All-Pros?  Wait… did I… I don’t think I phrased that correctly.


    One day, my girlfriend was telling me a work-related story about Wendy…  I was only half-listening, so I can’t remember what the story was about, but I know that it had absolutely nothing to do with Wendy’s sex appeal.  When she finished her story, I knew from the dead air that I was expected to come up with some witty commentary on the subject now…

    So, my dumb ass decides that now would be a great time to tell Pam that I’ve always thought Wendy was sexy as fuck!

    As you can imagine, this didn’t go over very well!  The Conversation went a little something like this:

    Me: Yeah, you know… I’ve always thought Wendy was a pretty attractive girl.

    Pam: Huh?  What does that have to do with spaying a cat?  And why’d you feel the need to tell me that?

    Me: I don’t know… it’s just… we were talking about her, and it just sorta popped into my head.  I mean, I’m not saying that I’d ever choose her over you… I’m just saying that I wouldn’t kick her out of bed, you know?  And while we’re on the topic – how the fuck did she end up married to such a douche bag?  He’s unemployed, and all he does is sit at home and spend the money SHE makes… and it’s not even like he’s anything to write home about in the looks department.

    Pam: Yeah, he is a douche bag… but, I still fail to see what this has to do with spaying a cat.

    Me: I don’t know… forget it.

    And this was where I realized that I had said too much, and an “I fucked up” gift was in order.

    She wasn’t really angry at me, per say, she was just sort of “perturbed” at my audacity.  She’s always known subconsciously that the girls she works with are on the higher-end of the female sexuality spectrum; but I guess since she only deals with them in a professional respect, she is able to “tune out” their sexuality and focus on their work-related abilities.  I, as a Y-Chromosome bearing male, am not… and thank GAWD for that!  I don’t think I’d be able to live in this world if I wasn’t able to gawk at boobies.

    “AMAZING!” OBSERVATION OF THE DAY: So, I was watching “Criminal Minds” today and they show a scene where the two detectives are standing over a dead guy.  They start noticing defensive wounds on his arms, and the one detective (who is surely a descendant of Sherlock Holmes) says, “I think at some point things got out of control for this guy and he wanted out”……..  NO FUKIN’ WAY!  How can you be sure??  I mean, it’s not like he’s sitting dead in front of you with bite marks on his hands, or anything!

    Now, THAT is some A+ writing folks!  The crack staff at Fox deserve a Pulitzer for this fine piece of work!  Way to go, Hemmingway!

    ~Roy “weekendkeyboardwarrior”

    • dannifoley 7:23 pm on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      It’s so cool that you and your girlfriend can be so honest with each other, and I think it’s awesome that you both can appreciate it. You guys sound really good together! 🙂

  • Mr Str8 Fwd 9:23 am on August 20, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: bambu, blunt, bong, dank, dutch, ez wider, ganja, hazard, haze, health risk, hemp, joint, marijuana, philly, piff, pot, reefer, rizla, smoke, smokin, smoking, spliff, swisher, weed, zig zag   

    17: #$# Puff The Magic Dragon *%* 

    Every day I take a flight

    Roll it up and take a light

    I don’t even need to sip

    Herbal substance, potent sh**



    There’s nothing more satisfying than a draw from a blunt. Oh yes!

    It’s that sweet remedy, that go to situation.

    But years of smoking takes it’s toll. It’s time for me to quit.

    I’m still young, but I started early. So for the sake of better health I’m going to quit.


    But until Friday rolls around and you get to reading this…..let me have a little fun. The main tool when dealing with the herbal remedy is a cigar. For a guy growing up in this part of Queens, only a cigar will do. We don’t have ready access to bongs and pipes. So you split the cigar in half, spill the contents, and add your own little blend. After that you roll it, light it up, and take off! Since 2002 this has been my daily habit. I’ve rolled numerous blunts and joints in that time and let me tell you, I dont get nearly as high as I used to.

    I used to get a kick out of it. I still do. And don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of benefits. But in my 8 year career I’ve become a daily user.  I’d find myself time after time rolling up. Eventually my breathing suffered. My throat gets dry much quicker. My laziness level has increased dramatically. My morale has dropped. And my luscious lips sport a black ring. So this is it. After an 8 year stint, me and Mary are finally breaking up. If I had more self control maybe I could control my intake. But for right now the best move is to stop altogether.


    Guess I  better learn to bake brownies!!



    Whether rollin a fresh L or smokin a few clips

    I’m fed up and finally thru wit this $#!T

    It used to help, now it’s bringin me down

    Thats a shame cuz my mother aint raise no clown

    Now I’m lazy as fuck, need to reach for the future

    Who knows, maybe I can become a producer

    But til the time is right, they’ll be no more lights

    Its time I wise up, fight the good fight

    • dannifoley 7:20 pm on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Interesting format, and kudos on your attempt at quitting smoking! You’ll feel better for it – and just think of all the money you’ll save!!

  • bghb 5:25 pm on August 19, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Bethany, Paranoid   

    16. I think I’m paranoid! 

    Maybe I’m the only one or maybe everyone feels this way but I swear every time I get on a computer in a public place I feel that almost everyone around me is basically watching my every move on the screen. Is there a site I could pull  up that would send the whole room into mass hysteria so that I can watch people run around the room screaming?  I’m sure most people would tell me “Noo you’re being silly no ones watching you on the computer, everyone’s doing their own thing!”


    You know how I know people watch other people on the computer? Because I watch other people on their computers haha. FYI people I’m a bit of a creeper from time to time. I like to people watch, human behavior, it fascinates me. If any of you haven’t seen The Human Zoo, search it on youtube and watch some of it, its absolutely amazing how people react to situations.

     The one that I really remember right now very well is how people reacted to a man in pain on the street. They set up an experiment, had a man writhing in pain on a sidewalk where dozens of people were walking by and had him scream for help.

    And people just kept walking by, they’d look at him and just keep walking. People almost never stopped to help him. Now upon watching this I think to myself as I’m sure you would to, “I’d totally stop and check on him!” But presented with the situation in real life would you? Would you really? I’d like to think to myself that I would but I’m not entirely sure I would just because you don’t know why that guys laying there in pain, he may have some kind of sickness that you could potentially catch if you went over to help him. And there’s the never-ending threat of the zombie virus, oh yes, I went there. Those zombies are coming! We just don’t know when.

    • dannifoley 7:19 pm on August 24, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      I haven’t youtubed the Human Zoo yet, but it sounds super interesting!
      And I guess I’m a creeper too because I totally check out what other people are looking at! I try to find an empty corner when using public wi-fi so that I can sort of hide my screen from others. It’s not like I have anything to hide, but it’s just weird to think that others are watching your ever move.

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